Yes, presumably there are women present in those scenarios, but the result- communal arousal-is the same. But in truth, Ward points out, there’s not much of a distinction between the communal experience of a jackoff club and, say, going to a strip club and getting a lap dance at the same time as your friend, or having sex in the same room as your male roommate during college. On its surface, the idea that a man might masturbate in front of other men as an assertion of heterosexuality might sound strange. Brame, also noting the added thrill of exhibitionism the setting provides. "For men who find it easier to come by hand rather than through penetration, it can be very freeing to be in a crowd with others who may be in the same place," says Dr. Alternatively, a masturbation club could offer a pressure-free opportunity to get off without the assistance of a partner. Doing it with a bunch of other guys may give a shy man permission to be his own wild self and enjoy the pleasure of masturbation," she says. Gloria Brame, a sexologist, the psychology makes sense. He said this was something he had a strong desire to share with other men.”Īccording to Dr. To this man, jackoff clubs weren’t “much different than guys popping the hood and comparing engines. She said one man said he frequently attended jackoff clubs because he wanted to masturbate in front of his female partner, but she had no interest in watching him do so. Ward, the author of Not Gay, says that some men with exhibitionistic tendencies jerk off in front of other men as a way to get validation-say, a compliment about the size of their genitals-that they may not necessarily get from their female partners. That said, for some straight guys who attend jackoff clubs, looking at or touching other penises may almost be beside the point. As Slate writer Kyle Mustain put it, “that’s a lot of not-gay dudes with profiles on a website for men who like to masturbate with other men.” And given the strict and arguably regressive codes governing male sexuality, which dictate that any man who so much as looks at another man has to be, if not gay, probably bisexual, it’s surprising that so many ostensibly straight men are interested in watching other guys touch themselves. There’s even a term for it on Tumblr: “ buddy bating.”Ĭoincidentally, the 10 percent figure Rosenberg reports also squares with data from BateWorld, a website featuring men uploading jackoff clips that has been referred to as “Facebook for masturbators.” According to a Slate piece on the phenomenon, approximately 10 percent of BateWorld’s users self-identify as straight, while 5 percent refused to self-identify either way-a number that pales in comparison to the more than 44,000 gay users of the site (50 percent of its audience 30 percent identifies as bi, while 5 percent would “rather not say”), but is nonetheless significant. Though there isn’t much data attesting to its exact prevalence, it’s far from uncommon for straight men to have had communal masturbatory experiences during adolescence, whether it’s beneath the alpaca blankets in their parents’ basement or behind the bleachers after gym class or in the bunks at sleepaway camp (or at John Lennon’s house). In truth, Brandon is absolutely right: his experience masturbating in front of other men is far from a singular one. “It was tame, fratty, kind of lame,” he said. Yet he says in retrospect, the weirdest thing about the incident was how not-weird it seemed at the time. He had never masturbated in front of another man, let alone a group of other men, before in his life. They never spoke of it again.īrandon self-identifies as straight. “And so we did.” After they finished, they zipped themselves up and proceeded to continue meandering through the caves, as if nothing happened. “It didn't take long for someone to suggest we all jerk off in the darkness,” Brandon, now 35, says. At a certain point, they reached a part of the cave that was pitch-black. When Brandon* was in his early 20s and studying abroad, he went on a trip to Israel with his friends to hike in the Judean caves.
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